Kesedihanku-Sammy Simorangkir

Sepinya hari yang ku lewati
tanpa ada dirimu menemani
sunyi ku rasa dalam hidupku
tak mampu ku tuk melangkah

Masih ku ingat indah senyummu
yang selalu membuatku mengenangmu
terbawa aku dalam sedihku
tak sadar kini kau tak di sini

Engkau masih yang terindah
indah di dalam hatiku
mengapa kisah kita berakhir
yang seperti ini

Masih ku ingat indah senyummu
yang selalu membuatku mengenangmu
terbawa aku dalam sedihku
tak sadar kini kau tak di sini

Engkau masih yang terindah
indah di dalam hatiku
mengapa kisah kita berakhir
yang seperti ini

Yang seperti ini

Engkau masih yang terindah
indah di dalam hatiku
mengapa kisah kita berakhir
yang seperti ini

Hampa kini yang ku rasa
menangis pun ku tak mampu
hanya sisa kenangan terindah
dan kesedihanku

dearest you... thank you...

Kepadamu. Terima kasih
telah menjadi tokoh utama sepenggal kisah hidupku
Menyadarkanku bahwa akhir cerita tak selalu indah
kadang sedih, bahkan tragedi
Kepadamu. Terima kasih
telah menjadi teman dalam pengembaraan singkatku
Menyadarkanku bahwa perjalanan hidup tak selalu menyenangkan
kadang berliku bahkan curam terjal
Kepadamu. Terima kasih
telah menjadi pangeran sesaat di singgasana hatiku
Menyadarkanku bahwa kekuasaan tak selamanya berjaya
bisa jatuh dan hancur di tangan musuh
Kepadamu. Terima kasih
telah menjadi objek dalam kalimat munajatku padaNya
Menyadarkanku bahwa jawaban sebuah doa tidak hanya “YA”
namun bisa “NANTI” atau bahkan “YANG LAIN”

Kepadamu. Terima kasih
telah membuatku mengerti
Ketika harap tak sejalan dengan realita
di sanalah ikhlas menemukan makna.

Tsurayya Azzahra (via livesmilingly)

I can't live without u baby... :'(

I'm here alone, didn't wanna leave
My heart won't move, it's incomplete
Wish there was a way that I can make you understand

But how do you expect me
to live alone with just me
'Cause my world revolves around you
It's so hard for me to breathe

Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air
Can't live, can't breathe with no air
It's how I feel whenever you ain't there
It's no air, no air

Got me out here in the water so deep
Tell me how you gonna be without me
If you ain't here, I just can't breathe
It's no air, no air

I can't live without you baby... :'(

aku takut...

aku takut....

aku takut kalo kamu pergi....

aku takut ga bisa contact sama kamu lagi...

aku takut... takut kamu hilang dari hidupku...

:(

please... jangan pergi dari hidupku yaaaaaaaa...

loving you...

thank you Allah... as You always teaches me how to love.. It supports me to get closer to You.. thank you for this chance even nobody can explain what's the reason behind this.. but enough for me to know that Your love is the reason why You gave me this second chance.. thank you for all the times You've given Yaa Rabb.. :)

my dark chocolate...

dear you...


I'm just happy to recieved your text today...


thank u to text me in your hectic flying times...


and you make me feel miss you so bad...


please God... tell him...


I miss my dark chocolate so bad... :D

Don't You Remember...

When will I see you again?
You left with no goodbye, not a single word was said,
No final kiss to seal any seams,
I had no idea of the state we were in,

I know I have a fickle heart and bitterness,
And a wandering eye, and a heaviness in my head,

But don't you remember?
Don't you remember?
The reason you loved me before,
Baby, please remember me once more,

When was the last time you thought of me?
Or have you completely erased me from your memory?
I often think about where I went wrong,
The more I do, the less I know,

But I know I have a fickle heart and bitterness,
And a wandering eye, and a heaviness in my head,

But don't you remember?
Don't you remember?
The reason you loved me before,
Baby, please remember me once more,

Gave you the space so you could breathe,
I kept my distance so you would be free,
And hope that you find the missing piece,
To bring you back to me,

Why don't you remember?
Don't you remember?
The reason you loved me before,
Baby, please remember me once more,

When will I see you again?

by. Adele

for you there... I know you have a good reason behind this... you left me for something better for you and me... may Allah save you heart and your love... :'(

*full "moon" last night.. I know you saw it too in other part of this world*

please remember Him..

“Wherever you are, whatever you are doing, wherever you are going: don’t forget to remember Allah. No matter how many slip up you’ve had or sins you’ve fallen into, the door is not closed, it’s still open: remember to return to Allah.”

it's time to let go... :'(

I hope this is the last night I remember everything about you...

yes... really I have to go...

You will soon enter into a covenant with her...

as the truth... it breaks me so...

no one beside me... I cry...

I keep my eyes on you...

but I have to let go of all our memories...

too beautiful... but too hurt to know the truth...

that you're not mine...

I will try to run away...

but even I don't know where should I run to...

the only one place for me to go...

I bend my knees and pray for the strength from God...

tell Him all about my wounds...

it's not your fault...

it's just my way that God gave me to learn...

I will try to enjoy this pain...

until I understand the reason that you have come to my life...

and I will smile to the world after this...

ya Allah...

this is my heart temptation... I know...

I have to turn my heart to You...

and the only for You...

so I close my heart today to other...

so there's only You inside...

no matter how hard.. as long as You beside me ...

I can be strong to pass it...

you there...

in wherever you are... just keep remember Allah in every step you make....

I pray in silent here for your happiness with her...

and I will always remember you as my beautiful memory...

I just hope this is the last time of losing for me...

and I won't let anyone come inside my heart until Allah send me the last person who will walk with 'til I die...

it's just bitter...

do not fight what we feel...
just feel the pain...
just feel the bitterness...
until this heart get used to with all these feelings...
the desire to have it like we want to achieve the star as too high expectations...
because love it should be...
can only be feels for our own self...

you will never understand this.... :(

*lunch time and just staying in my room (office)

first "Ramadhan" and first "August"...

It's so special month...
Ramadhan is always the month that I've been waiting for...
My second Ramadhan with alone...
Alhamdulillah... that Allah still give chance to be here and enjoy this Ramadhan in my imperfect life...

August...??
why is it to be so special too...?
just because in the end of this month is "Your Birthday"...?
and it coincides with the feast of Eid al-Fitr...
wow...!
but I don't know I will be there to say something to you or maybe I will just pray in silent to Allah...
really I don't know...


I've already walked out from you for couple weeks...
and tried just looked at the sky if I remember you...
but you came just to take my eyes back at you..
and everything still unclear for me...


maybe I'm just stupid...
cause as the truth I'm still standing here...
why should March 24 came to my life...
if it's just makes me stuck with this feeling...?
many times I've tried to move on..
but everything what you've done makes me feel so hard to let go of this feeling...
and I'm still here with pain now...
I think you're not stupid as you don't know how does it feel...
you just try not to look at it...


I don't know for how many times you will make it worst...???
why don't you just let me go...?
seems like we never met since 10 years ago...
just think that my birthday 10 years ago is the last time we've talked and never talk each other until today...
maybe it would makes me easy to leave you...


cause I don't wanna see you go and leave me...
so let me do it first before you...
cause I just want to remember you as the nicest one that I used to know you...
and let our teen memories never change.. it was about us as we were teens only...

ya Allah...

I surrender to You...

just let it flow... and let it happen as Your plan for me...

and I hope this beautiful Ramadhan will be the right time for me look at You... just only You...

heart and feel will never can choose the right place to be fall... and it's just happened unpredictable..

pieces of heart...

I will never forget the days we once had

The days when you were everything to me

My mind used to tell me we'd be together forever

But now I realize that was all a big dream

The feelings I have for you will never go

I wish I could take back that one regretful day

The day when I willingly let you slide from my arm

Never did I think of the astonishing pain of regrets

That I would once have to live through

The sight of you in someone else's arm

Makes my heart shatter into a million pieces

I sometimes wonder if you still think of me

Or if to you, I'm just a face in the crowd

I wish so very much that one day we can have it all back

But for now, I'll sit here silently

Remembering all the memories we once shared

Everyday my love grows much stronger

Hoping that one day you will feel the same

And put back the pieces of my broken heart

by Crystal Holtz

I've been living my alone

trying to get you out of my life

but after all this time

I can't help myself from crying

coz I'm missing you so much........

Talking To The "Moon"....

I know you're somewhere out there

Somewhere far away

I want you back

I want you back

My neighbors think

I'm crazy

But they don't understand

You're all I have

You're all I have

At night when the stars

light up my room

I sit by myself

Talking to the "Moon"

Trying to get to You

In hopes you're on

the other side

Talking to me too

Or am I a fool

who sits alone

Talking to the moon

I'm feeling like I'm famous

The talk of the town

They say

I've gone mad

I've gone mad

But they don't know

what I know

Cause when the

sun goes down

someone's talking back

They're talking back

I wonder why everytime I'm trying to move on... you come just to drag me back...

how can I not love you...? What do I tell my heart...?

Semua Tentang Kita... dulu...

Waktu terasa semakin berlalu 
Tinggalkan cerita tentang kita 
Akan tiada lagi kini tawamu 
Tuk hapuskan semua sepi di hati 

Ada cerita tentang aku dan dia 
Dan kita bersama saat dulu kala 
Ada cerita tentang masa yang indah 
Saat kita berduka saat kita tertawa 

Teringat di saat kita tertawa bersama 
Ceritakan semua tentang kita
 
Ada cerita tentang aku dan dia 
Dan kita bersama saat dulu kala 
Ada cerita tentang masa yang indah 
Saat kita berduka saat kita tertawa

by. Peterpan

People and feelings may change. But some place and some memories will last forever in our hearts....

tega.....

I know it's not the right time for me to expect your love anymore...

there's someone beside you already...

and it's time for me to put out the "light" in my heart...

no matter how it's feel...

I have to move on...

I'm very sorry I should walk away from you...

thank you for all our beautiful memories...

ya Allah...

please give me strength to leave it all...


full moon after the eclipse
16062011

Angel Of Mine

You are everything I need to see 

Smile and sunlight makes sunlight to me 

Laugh and come and look into me 

Drips of moonlight washing over me 

Can I show you what you are for me 

Angel of mine, can I thank you 

You have saved me time and time again 

Angel, I must confess 

It's you that always gives me strength 

And I don't know where I'd be without you 

After all these years, one thing is true 

Constant voice within my heart is you 

You touch me, I feel I'm moving into you 

I treasure every day I spend with you 

All the things I am come down to you 

Angel of mine 

Let me thank you 

You have saved me time and time again 

Angel, I must confess 

It's you that always gives me strength 

And I don't know where I'd be without you 

by. Evanescence

My Immortal

I'm so tired of being here

Suppressed by all my childish fears

And if you have to leave

I wish that you would just leave

Your presence still lingers here

And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too real

There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears

When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears

And I held your hand through all of these years

But you still have

All of me

You used to captivate me

By your resonating light

Now I'm bound by the life you left behind

Your face it haunts

My once pleasant dreams

Your voice it chased away

All the sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too real

There's just too much that time cannot erase

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone

But though you're still with me

I've been alone all along

moon... 

your light still faint in my heart...

 I don't know it's going to be bright or maybe it's going to be extinguish..

I never thought before that it's really hard to release..

I just wish that someday God will tell you how does it feel..

it's all about "heart"...

heart...

love...

feeling...

longing...

losing...

do ourselves can change all of these...?

it's not about the time...

it's not about who you are...

it's not about the chance...

maybe we are blessed to have all of these...?

I wish you could know what I feel...

I miss you...

I'm losing you...

and I know that nothing I can do...

It's hard for me to tell you that "I'm starting to love you"...

ya Allah...

really I surrender to You...

I don't know what I have to do...

do I wrong...?????

please tell me if I'm wrong God...

i miss you....

I'm just sitting here outside, looking at the fence for almost an hour and do nothing.. And remember that sounds of the laugh.. Yes.. This fence only.. and all the memories seems clearly.. I surrender to You my Lord... Astaghfirullah...

nothing lasts forever....

you've been a light in my dark...

when I was lost...

but you've also ever touched my pain...

these changes convinced me...
there's nothing lasts forever...

losing you have taught me...

there's nothing lasts forever...

"keep "ikhlas" in my heart and smile to the world"